Studies show that readers lose interest in a blog posting after 500 words. If we’re not talking about Kimye or the latest episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta, millennials can’t process anything above that number. With that being said, I can’t promise this article will be under 500 words. What I can promise is that you will be thoroughly entertained. And by entertained, I’m not talking about a Beyoncé World Tour performance. This type of thrill involves learning about a new country, the delightful delicacies, and a colorful culture tied to a rich history. Sounds fun, right?
If anything, this can simply serve as a few minutes of distraction from your job obligations because we all know you aren’t doing anything productive today. I suggest you relax, grab a cup of kopi luwak (you’ll learn about this special coffee if you read my previous article), and give me 10 minutes. I promise you’ll be back to “work” in no time.
NEW COUNTRY, WHO’S THIS
Putting pen to paper (or in this case, finger to keyboard) was a bit of a challenge. There was so much to write about. So I decided to provide you with an introductory course about Australia. You’ll learn fun facts about the country, where to eat, and helpful tips. Let’s get you acquainted with this beautiful location. Give a warm welcome to Oz!
- Compiled of six states and two main territories.
- It’s the world’s sixth largest country by total area.
- There are more kangaroos than people.
- Australian koalas are in danger of extinction because over half of them have chlamydia.
- Australia has 10 times more camels than koalas; it also exports camels to Saudi Arabia.
- 75% of the living species are unknown to man.
- Australia has over 10,000 beaches.
- Dendrocnide Moroides is a plant native to Australia. It will make you vomit just by touching it. The sting has been known to kill humans and other animals.
- Gay Rights Activist started a micronation in The Great Barrier Reef; it was called The Gay and Lesbian Kingdom of the Coral Sea Islands.
- Indigenous people inhabited Australia for nearly 50,000years before the British colonized. Unfortunately, there was a genocide committed against the indigenous people in an effort to create a more “white Australia”.
WHO LIED AND SAID TRAVEL WAS EXPENSIVE?
Shout-out to my friend, Ashley, who found our tickets. We snatched a 2 for 1 flight deal on Cheap DFW that was too good to pass up.
Price: The total cost for our roundtrip tickets to AustraliaAND Bali was $780.This may sound like a lot of moolah, bread, dough, paper, or whatever you kids call it these days, but it’s a steal considering flights to Australia and Bali typically start at $1,600. Even my old man, King of Frugalville, was impressed with the price.
I’m a supporter of Airbnb. I haven’t had an issue with them (knocks on wood). However, the Australian Airbnb lodging wasn’t up to par and the few places we liked weren’t located in an ideal location. So we elected to stay at Zara Tower Luxury Suites and Apartments. The SoHo Suites came with a king and sofa bed, and it was equipped with a full kitchen, microwave, free Wi-Fi and other amenities. It was wonderful.
ITIS INDUCING SUBSTANCES
- Vegemite—Aussies love vegemite. It’s an acquired taste, but I recommend tasting a sample.
- Rocket—aka barbeque sauce
- Kangaroo Burger—you have to try one!
- Kangaroo and Emu Pizza—different. It had a unique texture. I felt bad consuming the pizza immediately before we went to the petting zoo. I think the kangaroos knew I ate their cousin.
- Go to the Australian Heritage Hotel for kangaroo pizza and a wide selection of Australian beers.
- Pancakes on the Rocks stays open 24 hours.
- Basket Brothers has a delicious breakfast menu.
- Don’t leave until you’ve tried SoCal. The brisket macaroni and cheese was my favorite
- El Loco was recommended by several locals.
- Visit North Bondi Fish for great drinks and a beautiful view of Bondi Beach.
Price: Meals ranged from $8-30. I was being a fat a** so I spent a little more than I typically would in The States.
Uber was our best friend! Our drivers were cordial and conversant with Australian history. They all received high ratings.
Price: Charged by mile.
DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE WORDS COMING OUT OF MY MOUTH?
Even English can sound like an exotic dialect when you’re in another country, and Australian slang can be a language of its own. Here are a few terms to practice.
- Brekkie or Brekky—breakfast.
“I had eggs and bacon for brekkie.”
*Not going to lie; this is really fun to say
- Fair dinkum—to mean that something is truthful, genuine, or real
“Fair dinkum, would I lie to you?”
- Thong–they aren’t talking about your undergarments. Thong means flip flops
“D**n, Daniel! Back at it again with the white thongs.”
WHAT’S THE CATCH?
Visa is required for entry. Things to know:
- You can apply for an ETA Electronic Travel Authority online.
- To make an online application you will need your passport, email address, and credit card.
- ETA is automatically linked to your passport so there is no need for additional documentation or reference numbers.
- The ETA will allow you to stay in Australia for a maximum of three months for each visit.
- In most cases, you will be informed of the result of your application before leaving the online ETA system
- There is a $20 charge for processing.
I plan to return and you should plan to visit. If you have questions about Australia, don’t hesitate to reach out!